


Soft Blue Haze

by juneclouds



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Asphyxiation, Dark Shiro (Voltron), Gaslighting, Hurt Keith (Voltron), M/M, Major Character Injury, Non-Consensual Touching, Pre-Kerberos Mission, Somnophilia, Vulnerability
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 05:28:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29978094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juneclouds/pseuds/juneclouds
Summary: Shiro, caring for an injured Keith after a nasty hoverbike accident, watches over him as he rests in a deep medicated sleep. He’s so fragile like this. It frightens Shiro, but not for the reason he expects. He looks at Keith’s chest rising and falling slowly and he... wants to...
Relationships: Keith/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 27





	Soft Blue Haze

“Here. You need to keep hydrated, buddy” says Shiro. He hands Keith a glass of water with a straw.

Keith turns his head to the side and sighs. “Thanks, but ‘m not thirsty” he mutters.

Shiro has never seen Keith in such bad shape. After a botched landing on his hoverbike he managed to get a concussion, bruise his tailbone, and crack his right hip bone. Needing surgery, Shiro insisted on caring for him. Now, lying on Shiro’s couch propped up on pillows, he’s weak as a kitten a day into his recovery.

”Just one sip” insists Shiro.

“Okay” whispers Keith. Shiro holds the glass to Keith’s mouth and Keith takes small sips through the plastic straw. He turns his head away.

”How bad’s the pain? The doctor gave you medicine for a reason, Keith, you don’t have to tough it out without it.”

“It’s not that bad...” replies Keith, but afterwards he coughs and jostles his hip. He winces and his eyes water.

”C’mon, Keith.”

Keith nods. Shiro gets the pills out of the hospital bag and reads the label. “Two every six hours. They make you very drowsy, so maybe you can get some sleep. It’s late, anyway.”

Shiro practically feeds him the pills and soon Keith’s eyes are drooping. He rests a hand on Keith’s head and runs his fingers through his hair. Keith sighs and his eyes flutter shut.

“There we go” smiles Shiro. Keith is soon in deep sleep.

Shiro just looks at him. Keith is a very beautiful person to him, inside and out. He takes in his full eyelashes, the slight flush on his pale face. He listens to his soft, slow breaths. Shiro’s heart hurts for Keith when he’s suffering, yet he can’t deny that he’s so... sweet when he’s in such a fragile state. Innocent. Helpless.

It’s a strange thought. Shiro knows how strange he sounds to himself, but he shakes it off. He watches Keith’s chest rise and fall and he wants to...

He reaches a tentative hand out and lays it on Keith’s chest. The feeling of Keith’s breaths against his hand is... something else. He can feel his heartbeat, even. Slow and steady. Soft thumping, keeping Keith warm and alive. Keith doesn’t respond, as sedated that he is.

Shiro’s own heartrate seems to have risen. He slides his hand upwards and rests it on Keith’s throat. It’s so soft and pliant. He can feel Keith’s pulse even better this way.

He wants to squeeze.

Shiro frowns.

He shoves the thought into the back of his mind and moves his hand to Keith’s face. He cups his cheek and rubs him thumb along his skin. For a moment his thumb brushes over Keith’s lips and he feels his warm breath.

Before he can talk himself out of it he presses his palm against Keith’s mouth and squeezes his nose.

Shiro’s heart is racing. Keith’s lips are velvety. For a few seconds Keith doesn’t react, but then his brows furrow and he whines. Shiro strokes Keith’s hair with his other hand. Keith makes a few more noises of discomfort but can’t wake for the medicine in his veins. His fingers twitch, wanting to come up to his face, but he’s too weak right now. He’s completely at Shiro’s mercy.

And that, Shiro realizes, is what’s been tugging at the back of his mind. Why he’s doing this.

Keith makes another pitiful sound and Shiro lets go of him. Wheezes and desperate breaths are music to Shiro’s ears. After Keith calms Shiro steps away to the bathroom. He splashes cool water on his face and looks in the mirror.

He’s crossed a line and doesn’t know where to draw the next one.

In the morning Shiro helps Keith walk to the bathroom. He doesn’t know when Keith will start getting stronger but he realizes that he’s not looking forward to it. Shiro wants to keep taking care of him. The thought of Keith being... dependent on him puts butterflies in his stomach.

The next time the pills pull Keith under Shiro can’t stop thinking about his hand squeezing Keith’s neck.

Keith’s life in his hands. That’s what he craves. He wraps his hands around Keith’s throat. Keith doesn’t rouse. But before he squeezes he realizes that he can’t leave any evidence of this for Keith to find when he wakes. That’s out of the question. So, he can’t leave marks. Shiro pulls the blanket draped over Keith’s healing body and lays some of it on his throat. 

Shiro takes a couple of deep breaths. Then he squeezes the sides of Keith’s neck with one hand for several seconds. He lets go. Keith pants. He repeats. Keith's breaths are labored and shallow. He repeats more times until tears are rolling down Keith’s face. He lets out a long whimper that hurts Shiro’s heart.

In a good way.

But Shiro decides it’s enough. It’s a good thing, too, because he ended up doing this when the medicine was just about wearing off and Keith wakes.

”Mm...’m dizzy” croaks Keith.

”Yeah? I’m sorry, Keith. Maybe you’re dehydrated again” says Shiro. He smooths Keith’s hair away from his face and Keith unconsciously leans into Shiro’s hand.

”Could you get me some more water?” asks Keith.

Shiro smiles. “Of course.”

A few days later Keith sleeps and Shiro leans over him. He keeps pushing things further, probably too far, he knows that. But it was too far a long time ago.

He kisses Keith’s forehead.

”I love you.”

He leans down and nuzzles the pulse point in Keith’s throat. He feels the blood pumping under his lips. He wants to have control of it. If only to represent that he’s the only one to trust with it. He wants to leave Keith hanging on by a thread but never let him fall.

Shiro wants to hold Keith while he does this, reveling in the sweet juxtaposition of harm and healing. He thinks for a moment.

He collects the plastic bag from the hospital that had Keith’s medicine in it. He approaches the couch and gently tilts Keith’s head up off of the pillow and drapes the plastic bag over his head. He ties it under his chin, but not tight enough to leave marks. The bag inflates and deflates with every one of Keith’s breaths, crinkling.

”There we go” whispers Shiro. He caresses Keith, running his hands up and down his arms. Keith’s breathing quickens, his face grimacing in his sleep. Shiro rubs Keith’s chest in circles.

”It’s okay, sweetheart. I’ve got you.”

He leans further and gently embraces Keith. He can feel Keith panting against him. He holds him while he whimpers, still too weak to lift his arms or try to bite through the plastic in his sleep. Shiro rubs Keith’s sides and rests a hand against his bandaged hip.

He presses down against it. Keith cries out and only has a harder time breathing through the pain.

”Shh, shh, shh. You’re alright” soothes Shiro. “Relax. Nice deep breaths.”

Shiro leans back. Keith’s hair is wet against his forehead, his skin is white, his lips far too pale. Shiro feels cold. He quickly unties the bag and lifts it over Keith’s head. The gasps are grating, agonized, and Shiro gets a lump in his throat.

Keith’s eyes pry themselves open and they’re red and wet. “Ss-shiro...?”

”Hey, buddy. You looked like you were having a nightmare. You okay?”

”I... I can’t breathe...”

”Easy, easy, just breathe in five seconds, out five seconds. I’ll do it with you. Okay?”

Their breaths slowly synch as Keith recovers. But Shiro is shaken. That was too close. He could have lost Keith. That was the whole point, of course, the bet of Keith’s life that Shiro vowed to always win. But this has to stop before it gets out of hand. Besides, the medicine won’t last forever and Keith will only get stronger as time goes on.

And he does. He and Shiro do it together. But something has changed in their relationship. Keith doesn’t notice it but Shiro can feel it. He doesn’t know who he is anymore. Doesn’t know what he’s capable of.

But the strangest part is that he doesn’t feel guilty. Aware, concerned, but not guilty. 


End file.
